“I am what survives me.”

 

live forever book

Jane Brody, who has been writing about personal health and nutrition for The New York Times for years, might seem an odd source for a blog about mentoring entrepreneurs. But, of course, the title to her New York Times article Want to Leave a Legacy? Be a Mentor sub-titled How to make a positive impact that would keep you alive in the memories and lives of others caught my attention.

Her reading of Marc Freedman’s new book, How to Live Forever: The Enduring Power of Connecting the Generations inspired her to write this column about mentoring. Mr. Freedman, the founder of Encore.org and co-founder of Experience Corps, both dedicated to helping older adults find purpose later in life, calls himself a social entrepreneur. Mr. Freedman’s latest endeavor, now in its second year, is called Generation to Generation, a foundation-supported nationwide project that aims to “build a movement of older people focused on the well-being of future generations.”

Here’s the quote that hit the heart of the matter for me:

“The real fountain of youth is the fountain with youth,” Mr. Freedman said. “It’s spending less time focused on being young and more time focused on being there for the next generation.” As the developmental psychologist and psychoanalyst Erik Erikson said nearly 70 years ago, “I am what survives me.”

The bulk of the article is about how older people, like me, benefit from staying engaged with others and ways to do that. Certainly it’s been a privilege to be a mentor at MIT in several different programs, The Venture Mentoring Service, The MIT Sandbox Fund, and the Post-Doctoral Program. As a mentor I’m sure I get more out of it than I give: the brainpower, creativity, and drive of the students and alumni I mentor are energizing. I tell people that I’m like an RFID chip. Alone, I’m can be passive. But the powerful rays of energy radiating from an entrepreneur energize me just like an RFID chip is energized when struck by radio waves.

Mr. Freedman sees older people as uniquely suited for a mentoring role:

“The critical skills for nurturing relationships — emotional regulation and empathy — blossom as we age.” And, of course, those who are retired also have more time to devote to younger people, be they grandchildren, neighbors or strangers.

This is probably why I see so many gray haired heads at the monthly VMS mentors meeting!

But we do have some younger mentors, and there is no reason why young people can’t be mentors. In fact my 98-year old mother has been mentored in the use of her Apple iPad by Babsonn College students, who visit her at her continuing care retirement community. She raves about them all as being knowledge, patient, and helpful.

The key to mentoring is what I consider the purpose of life: gain personal satisfaction through helping others. It only took until age 60 for me to realize this! And ever since I’ve found that mentoring entrepreneurs is the best way I have to help others.

Through my successful ventures and the many more failures, I’ve learned a lot about mistakes to be avoided by founders and tell my mentees, “Please be creative, don’t  repeat my mistakes, invent your own!”

What survives us is the impact we have on others. There is no point in being the richest person in the cemetery, but having been the most influential would be worth striving for.

 

Author: Mentorphile

Mentor, coach, and advisor to entrepreneurs, small businesses, and non-profit organizations. General manager with significant experience in both for-profit and non-profit organizations. Focus on media and information. On founding team of four venture-backed companies. Currently Chairman of Popsleuth, Inc., maker of the Endorfyn app for keeping fans updated on new stuff from their favorite artists.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s